Leaving places has always been my thing, people by extension
Though I admit, leaving them behind was never my intention
How often does a kid have a choice in moving?
Few places ever felt stationary, I knew eventually my departure was due
Never to an actual home, just a location that was new
If you ask where my ‘home’ is, I say Texas
Not because I care for it, that’s just where I was born into
If you ask where my ‘home’ is, I say New Mexico
Not because I care for it, that’s just where I grew
If you ask where my ‘home’ is, I say Pennsylvania
Not because I care for it, that’s just where I carelessly withdrew
If you ask where my ‘home’ is, I say Washington
Not because I care for it, that’s just my latest view
Even in these states, it was always a new town or house or apartment.
Every place I felt stuck to, not tied to
Forced to sit like a patient duck.
I don’t like sitting.
I am not patient.
And I don’t like being the duck.
I left everyone I met behind
I like to excuse it as, oh well they really wouldn’t mind
But honestly I know, I didn’t grow attached ‘cause I knew I’d have to let go
I couldn’t embrace a fun time, and learn to reminisce its prime
Some places I say, ‘I miss it.’
But only for a visit.
Leaving you seems to be my thing, but it’s never my intention
How often does an adult learn they have a choice in leaving?
With you I felt stationary, calmed by the glue
Someone who felt like home, with seeds I could sew
If you ask me where my home is, I say Whidbey island
Because I care for it, since that’s where I met you
If you ask me where my home is, I say our highschool
Because I care for it, since that’s where I got to know you
If you ask me where my home is, I say your bedroom
Because I care for it, since that’s where I spent time with you
If you ask me where my home is, I say you
Because I care for you, and you’re who I’m tied to.
I don’t know how to stay, that’s never been my thing
Though I want to learn to,
So I can stay with you
But I am homesick,
From someone I want more than to visit.
devan tolsch, or oliver as most know them, is an inspiring writer with dreams of a blog, poems and books. outside of writing she’s likely falling on her roller skates, or pulling tarot cards. easy to find yet hard to catch, keep up with where he is next at @f0x_f4ce.
